Frankly, My Dear…

No, not me! A couple in NY with a 2 yr old plan to go for a year without toilet paper, or using any paper products, eating only organically grown food–grown within 250 miles of Mahatten– and making no garbage! He is a liberal tree-hugger who plans to write a book. (Won’t that be a waste of paper?) He’s calling it No Impact and has a website at: http://noimpactman.typepad.com/blog/

I am about to retire from recycling most things because in order to recycle, I have to store things and when ready drive downtown, which is about a 30 mins trip. I wish there was a pick-up service available but there isn’t. The last time I went, I was alone and no one else was there except for a man who appeared out of nowhere and attached himself to my back door. I didn’t see him when I drove up and suddenly, he’s knocking on the window of the passenger back door! It felt like my heart was on standby! I looked at him, turned around and asked myself–do I drive off with him attached to the car or do I unload the car that I had just loaded at home? He looked small (wasn’t considering a knife or gun!) so, I reluctantly unlocked the car and started unloading things. Throwing things was more like it! I threw a lot of stuff from as close to the car as I could. The whole time I was saying to myself–I am not coming back here again over and over! He was taking things out of the car, too. My guess is that he was from the soup kitchen a couple of blocks away. I didn’t ask! I became aware of my purse being in the front floorboard and knew it wouldn’t be too hard for him to reach over and get it. I don’t carry much money but having had my purse stolen before, I knew what a headache it is to replace everything!

We got through and I knew he expected money, so I got a dollar out and told him I didn’t have much money and with me standing inside the car door, he snatched it out of my hand and was off! I sat down in the car, locked the doors, restarted my heart and looked around and didn’t see him anywhere! I started the car and left quickly! I don’t know if I was more scared or angry! I didn’t ask for help and didn’t feel like I had a choice about it!

This was my second experience like this. The first time the guy was waving me in and took stuff out of the car while telling me he was hoping to get a job, etc. When the car was unloaded, I wished him luck with the job, got in the car and left! I only had change and there was no way I was going to open my purse in front of him! At first, I thought maybe he’d been hired to help on week-ends but now I think word has been passed around the soup kitchen and I don’t plan to go back!

I’ll still take the newspapers to the church down the road and do what I can do in safety, but no more going to the recycle center downtown!

And btw, I don’t know who thought of locking the car doors with one button, but bless ‘em! I always lock the doors when I go downtown. I was at a former neighborhood post office one night around 7 pm, putting stamps on some cards, and I saw motion out of the corner of my eye. I surprised myself with how fast I hit the lock button! A man was standing by my door and when I cracked my wondow, he was telling some tale about his girlfriend dumping him out and he didn’t know where he was and would I take him to the highway! WHAT? I’m wondering if I have stupid on my face? No way was I taking him anywhere! I suggested he walk down to the grocery store and ask one of the guys for a ride and he left–and so did I! The next time I was in the store, I asked the cashier if he had come in and she said he had and one of the guys gave him a ride. Not that I was concerned. I was just checking to be sure he needed a ride!

And this brings me to the 250# drunk cop in Chicago that beat up the bartender who was half his size! Ladies, if someone attacks you, forget you’re a lady and fight as dirty as you can! You know what I mean–grab hold and create as much pain as you can! Kick the knee, go for all the soft spots. Great if you have a weapon. I’m sure this lady was so shocked it was hard to think, but she could’ve hit him with a beer bottle. The men in the bar did not help! I don’t know if it was because he was a cop or they were just too drunk, but dang–no help, at all?! It was really brutal! She survived but is scared to go out now.

Lock your car doors, ladies!

A guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: “Free to good home. You want it, you take it.” For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too untrusting of this deal. It looked too good to be true, so he changed the sign to read: “Fridge for sale, $50.” The next day someone stole it. Caution… They Walk Among Us

One day I was walking down the beach with some friends when someone shouted, “Look at that dead bird!” Someone looked up at the sky and said, “where???” …They Walk among us

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which direction was north because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him up every morning. She asked, “Does the sun rise in the north?” When my brother explained that the sun rises in the east, and has for sometime, she shook her head and said, “Oh, I don’t keep up with that stuff.” …They Walk Among Us

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, “The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.” He responded, “Is that Eastern or Pacific time?” Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, “Uh, Pacific..” …They Walk Among Us

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but “didn’t think she’d get sunburned, because the car was moving.”…They Walk Among Us

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car. It’s designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it in the trunk. …They Walk Among Us

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases. The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount on both. …They Walk Among Us

I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area, so I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained professional and I was in good hands. “Now,” she asked me, “has your plane arrived yet?” …They Walk Among Us

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6. He thought about it for some time before responding. “Just cut it into 4 pieces. I don’t think I’m hungry enough to eat 6 pieces.” …Yep, they walk among us… and they breed!

There sure was a lot of confusion and frustration at the airport for all the teams attempting to get a ticket to the African nation of Tanzania! Charna and Mirna went to a different ticket counter and made plans to go to Johannesburg and try to get there that way. Other teams think that’s risky and decide to stay at the airport overnight. Teri wanted to go back to the hotel but Ian insists they need to stay at the airport. Eric and Danielle get on a plane only to be taken off, because the seats belong to someone else. If someone else got on, it wasn’t shown. Danielle is very upset.

The cousins have a prayer with a ticket agent in Johannesburg to get on the plane to Dar Es Essalaam and it works! They wonder where the other teams are after they land and go to the ferry terminal to get the first ticket to ride a dhow (boat) to the island of Zanzibar. Their trip is postphoned by a storm and the next day, Danny and Oswald are there to join them in their sailing trip. Charna gets sick and spends some time looking at the water!

Meanwhile, back at the airport, Ian and Teri and Bill and Joe are still trying to get on a flight! After 2 nights in the airport, they’re finally on their way!

Back on the island, the tasks are Solve It or Schlep It. Solve it involves putting a 62 piece wooden puzzle together. The puzzle recreates an image from a style of local artwork, called Tinga Tinga. In Schlep It, teams had to go to Kjangwani Lumber Yard, put a 50# log on a cart and take it to a shipyard a mile away. The logs are used to make the native boats, dhows.

The cousins and best friends both decide to do the puzzle and the best friends finish first, but on their way to the next destination decide to stop and buy fruit. This gives the cousins a chance to get ahead. They are first to arrive at the tiny village of Kikungwi, home to the Massai, on the island of Zanzibar. The Roadblock here is to use a Kungu, a woooden weapon used by the Massai, to hit a clay mask 65′ away. Mirna was the first to hit the target. What luck! The Pit Stop was Old Fort, an 18th century fortress.

The cousins were the first to hit the mat and when Phil told them they’d each won a catamaran they were silent and then asked him what it was! He told them it was a boat! Charna may want to sell hers!

Uchenna and Joyce had no problem with the time penalty from last week and safely came in third. He got to jump with the Massai and was pretty happy about that, too!

Beauty queens did the log task and were fourth.

Teri and Ian and Joe and Bill were neck and neck from the time they did the puzzle. Teri and Ian didn’t realize right away that the puzzle pieces were painted on both sides and finished alittle behind. This proved to be their downfall, as they were last and eliminated.

I wonder what Rob and Amber were doing?